A Cry From The Far Middle

 

P.J. O’Rourke,”A Cry From The Far Middle,” Atlantic Monthly Press, 2020, 219 pp.

Satire and humor are great tools to make a point.  But, as with everything, too much of a good thing can be annoying.  This was my thought through much of this book even though here-and-there I picked up some useful thoughts and a laugh or two.  The author was 72 in 2020 when writing the book: maybe curmudgeonly sets in at that age.  The title indicates that there is a middle ground, I didn’t find it.

My Notes:

Pg. 1:  Half the nation is saying, “We don’t know what’s wrong with America, but we can fix it, “while the other half says, “There’s nothing wrong with America, and we can fix that.”

Pg. 16:  Ravaged by climate change.  Torn by internecine strife.  Gross inequality in the distribution of wealth.  Widespread poverty.  Drug use.  Oppression of women and minorities.  And that was in 1491.  Next year things got much worse.

Pg. 23:  A friend of mine recently told me that America’s angry perplexity made him feel confused.  (Admittedly he’s a cisgender heteronormative middle-aged white male from the Midwest and can’t be expected to truly have feelings.)  I don’t get it,” he said.  “America emerged from the Cold War with a military that dominates the world and an economy that does the same and now business is booming.  Why aren’t we fat and happy?”  Well, we’ve got the fat part.

Pg. 40:  Civil liberties.  Free speech.  Property rights.  Rule of law.  Representative democracy.  Free enterprise.  Free trade.  These are the ideas of Classical Liberalism.  Since 1776 the fortunate among us have been living in places where those ideas were embraced.

Pg. 58f:  A libertarian walks into a bar and happens to sit down on a bar stool next to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.  The libertarian stares up at the bar’s TV as the 10 o’clock news comes on.  The news crew has its camera on a man standing on a ledge of a tall building getting ready to jump.

            Alexandria looks at the libertarian and says, “Do you think he’ll jump?”

The Libertarian says, “I bet he will.”

Alexandria says, “Well, I bet he won’t.”

The libertarian puts $20 on the bar and says, “You’re on.”

Just as Alexandria puts her own money on the bar, the man on the TV screen jumps and falls to his death.  Alexandria is very upset but she hands her $20 to the libertarian, saying.  “Okay here’s your money.”

The libertarian says, “I can’t take your money.  I saw this earlier on the five o’clock news and I knew he would jump.”

Alexandria says, “I saw it too.  But I didn’t think he’d do it again.”

 

Pg. 117:  First Golfer:  Take a look at this golf ball.  Doesn’t matter how bad you hook or slice.  It’s got a flashing red light and a beeper and a GPS chip and a Bluetooth tracking locator and a camera that sends you a selfie of its location.

Second Golfer:  Wow! Where did you get that golf ball?

First Golfer:  I found it.

 Pg. 169f:  Each state gets electors in the Electoral College equal to the state’s number of congressional districts plus two (its number of senators).  And the District of Columbia also gets three electors (because back in 1961 the residents of Washington, D.C., complained that they weren’t getting a say about the president).  Thus, the Electoral College has 538 electors.  Choosing electors in each state is mostly a matter of winner take-all.  The presidential candidate with the most votes in a state gets that state’s votes in the Electoral College.  (Maine and Nebraska can split their electors according to who wins in which congressional district). 

Pg. 178f:  General Powell proposed eight questions that should be answered ‘yes’ before America uses military force (The Powell Doctrine):

1.      Is a vital national security interest threatened”?

2.     Do we have a clear attainable objective”?

3.     Have the risks and costs been fully and frankly analyzed”

4.     Have all other nonviolent policy means been fully exhausted?

5.     Is there a plausible exit strategy to avoid endless entanglement?

6.     Have the consequences of our action been fully considered?

7.     Is the action supported by the American people?

8.     Do we have genuine broad international support?

Pg. 213:  What a land of equal opportunity this is.  Seeing hundreds of my fellow countrymen in their cars makes it clear that, in America no one is too intellectually challenged, emotionally fragile, beset by anger management issues, encumbered by dementia, or burdened by obsessive compulsive disorders involving personal communication devices, burritos, and Grande Caffe Lattes to have a car.  There may be discrimination in this country but not on the highways.